Captain Blackbeard was an excellent recruiter.

“Tax breaks aside,” he’d say, “there’s three perks to being a pirate. You’ll travel the world, work with animals and enjoy a great pension scheme!”

Blackbeard never had a reputation for nurturing talent and failed to pass on his map drawing skills.

Fifty years on I realise I should have pushed him for training. My X looked fine but what way to hold the map? How’d I forget to write north on the thing?

“East!” I confidently proclaimed to the trusting crew.

A one in four chance? Maybe. I’ve made it through tougher odds.